Be careful what you wish for

Ive been absent from this blog, I do apologize. Lately life is been a roller coaster ride. I have been back in chastity for the past two months, but I haven't always been on my best behavior. Again we have both been very busy, and it is hard for me to stay focused when we both have so much on our plates. It's also hard for me to stay chaste, I do s better job behaving when she is engaged with the lifestyle fully, and as of late that hasn't been the case. I've been in diapers at night the entire time, not during the day though. We did go on a walk the other day around the neighbor hood, and I had a diaper on under my gym shorts. That's as close to wearing in the day time as I've got.

A few weeks ago I began making what she has wanted for so long; my "crib". We built the entire thing from scratch, it's framed around a twin mattress and box spring. It's fully lockable, with wooden "rails" for the sides and top. Once I'm locked in I couldn't get out unless I broke one the wooden rails.  It's been done for a few days, yet last night was the first time I slept in it, yet it wasn't the reason I had such a restless night. One of her Christmas presents came in the mail two days ago; my posey straight jacket. She wanted it to be tight, so we ordered a small. Let's just say my excitement for the jacket died quickly, it's fun for an hour, not all night.

Last night I got home late, I was quickly diapered and put in plastic panties. She then led me to my room, and proceeded to put me in the straight jacket. After tucking me under the covers, she locked the crib door and went to bed. Sleep was hard, I kept waking up and drifting off. I couldn't use my diaper laying down, I still haven't went number 2 since then. I kept fighting against the arm sleeves, the crotch strap kept the pushing the wet diaper into me, and I was not happy. I don't like not sleeping next to her, I really didn't like being alone. Around 5:00am she came in and took off my jacket and locked the crib. I would have killed to go back to our bed, I mean "her" bed. By morning my diaper was bloated, I fell into s deep sleep once the jacket was off. "I don't know about you, but I had the best sleep in years, I love this crib" she said. I was reminded through out the day that I was sleeping in the jacket again, in my "crib". I'm not looking forward to it, I just want to sleep, in peace, next to her. Be careful what you wish for

I truly thought I'd be living in a box under the bed by now!!!!!

If you haven’t gathered it thus far we lead very busy lives! I hate the pause between postings, and I hope it gets better. I also hope she begins to write again soon, only time will tell if that’s the case. The past week has been fun! Outside of the world of FLR, though my device has been locked on during the day, and I’m diapered at night. No set chore list yet, or anything like that, though two nights ago she was mad that I hadn’t been using my diaper to the fullest. I replied I would start when she got more involved, she said tonight you “will make a mess”. Well if it wasn’t two hours later I did, and it kept coming, it was awful! She put two pairs of plastic panties on me (locking on top) then placed me in a pink onesie I had been hiding from her. A long time ago she told me to buy one, I thought it was so ridiculous when it came in I hid it in my closet and forgot about it. One of our animals drug it out and that was all she wrote. When she looked at it she was terrible excited, smiling ear to ear. After she put it on she smiled at he handy work and clapped, terribly happy…she continued to use baby references for the rest of the night. I still think she’s going to take a regression path, she loves it so much, and I hate it.

With Christmas coming up, I told her I’d get her some stuff related to this, and asked if she still wanted a straight jacket, her reply was simple “I think so, I mean, you know I get busy where I have a lot of stuff I need to do around here, it would be a way for me to take care of you quickly, and not have to worry about you for the rest of the day”.  So this is a sure thing, that and she wants an isolation hood, I also want to have a custom hypnosis file made for her, shes a big fan of esuccubus.com, which is where all of our files come from. Still though nothing is all that bad! Nothings gone up my rear! No diapers in public! No long time uncomfortable situations! When I’m not doing anything, I watch TV, dick around…the usual; I haven’t even been spanked haha! So we will see how things progress! The only down side right now is her memory, she keeps leaving the key to my cage home…what’s the point of a lock if you have access to the key?! I told her I’ve been good both times she’s left it, yet next time I wont be! I’m going to try to be better, I know I’m not supposed to control any situations, and the only reason I am typing this is because my blogs my safe place. When she threatened to send me to another Mistress for a weekend in hell, I talked about it a lot, told her I was for it, thought it would help…so much to the point where she truly believed I wanted it, and never sent me. Truth be told a weekend sleeping tied up, copious amounts of punishment and humiliation, truly was the last thing I wanted. I feel kind of bad for manipulating a situation, I just feel I have better things to do most weekends than be paraded in public in a diaper, or spanked until my ass is as red as Santa’s coat. So anyway, that’s off my chest…

A busy unlocked weekend!

A very busy weekend it was! We had several events with friends on Friday and Saturday which took us away from home for the weekend. It was fun, yet it made the weekend go by so fast! She took my chastity device off for both occasions as she was with me and it makes an obvious impression in suit pants. Saturday night though we returned home and were both pretty intoxicated, she didn’t put my diaper or device back on and we ended up having sex. She was not happy about that in the morning, saying I took advantage of her being drunk, well I was drunk and she helped me get it started! LOL. She enjoyed it, as did I, yet that still didn’t curb her frustration given what happened. “Your in so much trouble…” was all she said. I told her while we were having sex she could extend my chastity stent to 90 days, she has not told me what the release date it yet. Sunday we had a productive day and (cage and diaper free) I led the charge on detailing our entire home. It looks so good, and she was beyond happy with the progress. Towards the later part of Sunday evening she kept saying she wanted to get me back in my device and diaper, I told her once we finished the house I would. She works well off motivation, yet in reality I shouldn’t be giving her ultimatums, but if I can get away with it…I see no reason to stop. I’m sure she figures I “got off” during this time, she hasn’t asked and I doubt I would admit I did (I don’t want her to be angry). Before we laid down she crammed me back into my super small chastity device and diapered me very tight “These aren’t coming off again…get comfy”. She scolded me again about sex the night before, and reiterated her want of a crib.

We’ve agreed I would convert a wooden framed twin bed into a “crib”, I have a feeling the spare bedroom we don’t use often is basically going to be converted into “my room”.  She’s expressed the need for a changing table, fully enclosed “crib”, high chair, and one other addition I plan on surprising her with. I’m going to make an “isolation box”,  a fully enclosed box which will be sound proof, very small, and very crammed. I think it will be useful for her with punishment and deterring me from acting out.  The crib were sketching up is going to be far from comfy as well. She was persistent on using an actual crib, yet my concerns with not being able to fully stretch out won. The crib will not be tall enough for me to sit up, I will be able to lie down, have her strap me to the bed, and she can lock the top. There’s a picture of the design were aiming for in an old post of mine. One thing did startle me, I woke up in an absolute mess, and I really don’t remember doing it. This did make her happy, so we’ll see how that progresses. It’s a good thing shes not a nurse and catheters scare me, I have a feeling I’d have one of those in all the time…though the thought of loosing all control is exciting, yet scary.

October update, slow and steady win the race

To pick up where I left off, that night she ended up putting me in a new diaper as we layed down for bed. She didn’t want to smell it all night and realized with how bad the mess was I’d more than likely get a rash. She is slowly getting back into a rhythm of things; it’s pretty simple honestly… She text me a list of chores to do when I get home, my chastity device doesn’t come off, and a diaper is put over it at some point in the evening. The other night I woke up to a terrible pain, the chastity device digging into me as the diaper pressed it further into my body. In a zombie like state I got up, removed the diaper and left it on the bathroom floor and went back to bed. She was irate in the morning, and everynight since when I’m diapered she puts the thick locking fetware diaper covers on.  I guess I’m getting used to being in the chastity so much, before it came off everynight, which at least enabled me to stretch. Not now. I know she will slowly add more and more, if she goes at her own pace then she is certain she’ll be successful. I do have a feeling and she’s stated she we’ll be doing much more age regression. She didn’t like the idea last year, but for some reason I think this time will be different.  Still things aren’t super strict, When she diapers me I put shorts on immediately to cover them up, that use to be a no-no. So I suppose time will only tell, I hate that I’m not in “sub space”. I prolly wont get in that place in my mind for months. I jokingly asked her to send me to a boot camp to speed things up, she said “its obvious you want to, so no”.  As my frustration builds over the next 40 days I’m sure this will be easier. I currently hate putting the diaper on, its no longer a feeling of comfort as it was before when my device came off when it went on. I know this evening she has something planned, I’ve gotten back to the house late every night so far this week due to work. I have a busy weekend ahead of me, so look for updates early next week. On another note I hope Susan over at “All mine” is doing ok, it’s been nearly six months since they have updated their blog, I hope Tammy, Jay, and she are doing well.  It’s hard to say where we will be in a few months, we love feed back, keep commenting!

be careful

Be careful what you wish for. I've been back in Chastity for two days, the device never comes off. It stays on even diapered. I'm currently sitting, locked, in two abena m4's with 2 bambino quadro stuffers, inside of them is a 2 quart enema I had to hold for 10 minutes. Topped with locking plastic panties, I'm uncomfy, I feel gross, I want a change and won't get one till morning. I'll update soon

Hate hurting her.

I think it's sad I'm so selfish at times, that I choose to jack off rather than have Sex with my own wife.   Maybe I deserve what's coming. We've had some delays in starting, yet last week she found a huge stash of my rags and boxer I used to jack off in. She was so sad and angry, she said "I finally understand why women turn their husbands into cuckolds. In time I'm going to have to find someone else, because this is so out of hand". I truly don't like hurting her, yet today she found another huge stash under the bed, she looked crushed. We had to run some errands and she was pretty quiet, I said I need to find a restroom in the store and all she said was "soon you won't have to worry about that" and walked off. I'm my own undoing I guess, she has plans apparently, I suppose we will see.

Preparing for the long haul

I know this blog seems like a roller coaster; on and off, yet there are reasons for that. Last month Mistress and myself had a MAJOR life event, don't worry it's a good thing! We needed to enjoy that to the fullest, no kinks attached! Now that it has passed we and she specifically have so much more free time, which means she finally a gets to partake in the lifestyle she's always wanted... Without any distractions. My chastity device clicked closed' this morning, I'm sitting in bed in a very dirty diaper right now... I just ordered 200 Abena M4's, 160 bambino booster pads, a new enema and a pink onesie at her direction. Sex for me is over for along time, I won't be getting off for the next 4 months. This king size bed won't be mine to use next week, I'm switching to a 54 inch dog kennel as my new sleeping arrangement.  After years of trying it's finally here, I hope you enjoy the upcoming journey.