A Slave in the making

I don't have to dress up like this! Yay!

Let me apologize, I can assure you this will not be the time between post! November has been a very different month since I was gone two weeks ago on vacation (as I hinted at in my last post). Well last week I was traveling across the country for work and arrived home this past Friday. My Fiancee...Mistress???? (she's not to the point of making me call her anything, I'm sure that will come later) was waiting for me at the terminal when I landed home. It was so nice to see her, I missed her dearly and she missed me. With the flying I was not in chastity during my trip, and despite her attempts I did not pack any diapers...freedom!!!!!! well, too much honestly. I did jack off a few times while I was bored in the hotel, and I truly did feel bad, bad enough I was honest with her when I got home and she asked me about it. Of course she was not happy, but I mean...isnt the point of a chastity device to prevent that...my mind isn't a chastity device!!! My mind is the mind of guy, not an obedient submissive....even during my last stint in chastity when she was very consistent, the only time I came into a truly submissive place was when I was dressed up, locked up, and in a humiliating position. The diapers I'm getting used to, I know they aren't going away...ever during this process, so if she sees me diapered its the new normal, the maid stuff was never normal. I'm sure I'll get more submissive as I get hornier and she gets more back into the swing of things, which she slowly is.

Two days before I was due to leave she wanted me diapered early in the evening, she placed me in two Abri-forms and put my "panties" on over them.  It seemed I wet them immediately and messed them within the hour, by the time bed time came around I was waddling around the house and they began to swell a fair amount. I pouted going to bed, I hate sleeping in a messy diaper...it always seems she's happier when she knows I'm sitting in filth. I wet through out the night, more than likely without knowing and when I awoke the next day it was beyond full and swelled to it's fullest size. "Please can you change me" I asked in calm voice, "No...your going to leave them on for awhile, it will help you get used to them...go make some breakfast for us and we can discuss your dirty diaper after the house is clean". FINALLY a little before lunch I got a very embarrassing diaper change, it always is when I mess.

Back to arriving home from my work trip, she put me in chastity as soon as I got home and spanked me when I told her I had jacked off. It wasn't a bad spanking, it didn't hurt, she was using her hand so I presume it hurt her worse than me. She changed the lock on my Mature Metal Jail bird to a hardened master lock which I tried cutting in the past with bolt cutters and failed, I've also ordered a longer spiked pin for my chastity device with will make getting off impossible without cutting myself (so I won't be getting off). I also just ordered her a pair of locking plastic panties... we need another pair and she needs the option of forcing me to stay in them, I suppose I'll call it an early stocking stuffer :)

Later Friday Evening she diapered me and spanked me again for jacking off, again it didn't hurt...I suppose she forgot where her wooden spoon is haha. For some reason my stomach was giving me major problems and I could not stop going! It was terrible, she looked on with a evil grin "Your getting used to them pretty fast this time...it won't take long at all..." and she left it with that. There is a strange sense of comfort in them next to her, maybe I feel vulnerable, or ashamed, I'm not sure but I slept like a baby (no pun intended). The next morning I was a mess and I whined about wearing them, of course they stayed on until the house was clean and finally came off early afternoon on Saturday. We had a busy day of running errands and dinner with my family Saturday night, nothing out of the ordinary when we got home, my cage came off and she diapered me. Then I said something that pissed her off and the next thing I knew she had me in the closet sitting on the floor. She chained and locked each of my arm to respective side of the closet, opening the door again she placed the large ball gag in my mouth and blind folded me. "Do NOT talk back to me anymore, stay in here for a few hours and think about it"....sigh the time went by rather fast and I was let out. My diaper was wet at that point and we sat on the bed and I asked her if she would explain this new "go with chastity to me". So she did and what came out of the conversation was what follows:

Her wedding present...

"Your not having sex with me until the wedding, and maybe the honeymoon...I'll be fucking you on those nights as well. You need to enjoy those times because after that no more sex for you, unless your taking my strap on up your ass. Right now I'm slowly getting back into this, the wedding is causing me to be very busy. After christmas your going to start living a much more slave appropriate lifestyle, in regards to your privileges, what you can and can't do, where you can and can't sit...where you crawl, and some training to get your positions back. The diapers are here to stay, after christmas you go in them 24/7, and I mean that, even to work, no more toilet. In time your going to develop incontinence, don't worry that's part of my plan. I want you sleeping in a cage before new years eve...because on new years eve your going to be sitting in a nice full diaper in your cage while I go out and party. Your going to be sleeping in a cage every night, it will be in the closet more than likely, maybe next to me if your good. Im not going to feminize you fully, I don't want to...but I could change my mind, I will turn you into a girl if your bad. And if you really piss me off I will dress you up and take you to the mall...don't test me...you know Marla works there (her best friend) and she knows all about your little dick cage. So. Behave. After the new year your going to be in full time slave mode, where you'll stay. Right now I can't see you getting off for pleasure, you blew that. So I'm going to milk you every two weeks, I'll also be fucking you a lot more soon; a few times a week. Down the road I may cuckold you, that's at least a year or two away."

Though I think she's bluffing on cuckolding I know she's serious on the rest, and I'm ok with it. I know in a year from now she will have me back to being a sissy. She still calls me debbie, makes me wear panties (even though I'm still getting away with boxers) and so on, so we will see. I think if we get to the point where we are both happy with where we are at with this process and she cuckolds me, she will have me molded into a full blown sissy maid. Right now I think her goal is to mold me into her submissive...we will she how it goes.

Feedback is welcome!

Goodnight!

Deb